Staff Picks!

This Month’s Picks: Dad Jokes

Get to know our Helium Comedy Staff! Every other month, we pick a theme and ask our staff to submit their personal favorite and why. Do you see any of your favorites below?


Erza I

Box Office, RDU

"When does a joke become a Dad Joke? When it becomes aparent.”

Diana C

Senior Marketing Manager, PHL

”What type of shoes do reptiles wear? Snake-ers!”

Tommy K

Server, BUF

"God said to John “Come forth and receive eternal life” but John came fifth and won a toaster.”

Gabby C

Marketing Associate & Exec Asst, PHL

”A firefighter walked into a room holding a screwdriver and yelled, “EVERYONE GET OUT, THIS IS NOT A DRILL!”

Caroline S

Daytime Admin, PDX

"What is Forest Gump's password? 1Forrest1.”

Matt P

Graphic Designer & Marketing Associate, PHL

”Why did I only eat 239 beans? Because 1 more would be too farty.”

Chey M

Office Manager & Admin, STL

"Why did the pony ask for water? Cause it was a little horse.”

Dan T

Marketing Manager, PHL

”Who wins in a fight between Sunday and Monday? Sunday, because Monday is a weekday.”

Cammi G

Box Office, AUS

"Why was the pepper wearing a jacket? Because he was a little chili.”

Naja R

Server, RDU

”How do you find Will Smith in a snowstorm? You look for fresh prints.”

Vinny K

Bartender, PHL

"How does The Rock pee? He Dwaynes his Johnson.”

Shayna D

Video Production Asst, PHL

”I was wondering why my frisbee kept getting bigger and bigger... then it hit me.”

Jordan F

Digital Marketing Manager, PHL

"What's the best time to go to the dentist? Tooth-hurty.”

Nicklaus B

General Manager, IND

”Shout out to people wondering what the opposite of "in" is.”

Ben M

Marketing Associate, PHL

"Doctor: You have Tom Jones Syndrome Me: Is that common? Doctor: It's not unusual.”

Mike M

General Manager, PHL

”Knock Knock. Who's there? I eat mop... I eat mop who?!”

Sydney J

Marketing & Box Office Asst, PHL

"Where do baby cats learn to swim? The kitty pool.”

Chandy K

General Manager, AUS

”How do you make a tissue dance? Put a little boogie in it!”

Peyton D

Daytime Admin, RDU

"My grandmother used to tell us a joke. She’d say, “Knock knock,” we’d say, “Who’s there?” Then she’d say, “I can’t remember,”… and start to cry.”

Jay S

Video Editor, PHL

”Kid: "Dad I'm hungry" Dad: "Hi Hungry, I'm Dad."

Gabe B

Daytime Admin, AUS

"Why don't cats like to play poker? Too many cheetahs.”

Colleen M

Bartender & Outreach Coordinator, PHL

”Kid: "Dad I'm hungry" Dad: "Hi Hungry, I'm Dad."

Ben W

Lead Security, AUS

”What does a rain cloud wear under its clothes? THUNDERWEAR!”

Diego H

Senior Graphic Designer, PHL

"What do you call a line of men waiting to get haircuts? A barberqueue.”

Abdou D

General Manager, RDU

”I hate my job - All I do is crush cans all day. It's Soda Pressing.”